Authentic!

I had at least three different conversations last week that included some aspect of, "What does it mean to be authentic?"  That seems like a great question, so of course it's made its way into our message this week!  

What does it mean to be Authentic?

It means to be true to my unique self with all of my strengths, gifts, and challenges. It's about accepting myself for who I am with grace and honesty.  It is also a willingness to allow others to be their unique selves with all of their strengths, gifts, and challenges. Being Authentic recognizes that I am designed in a unique way and that is not the same way that others are designed.  So being Authentic means I give permission for others to see and approach the world differently than me. 

To be Authentic means I get to be me, and I also create room for you to be you!

What doesn't it mean to be Authentic?

It's not an excuse for bad behavior or an unwillingness to grow. Knowing who I am and working to understand who you are takes into consideration that we are also dynamic people who are on a journey of growth (hopefully).  As a result, I don't get to use being Authentic as some kind of excuse for poor behavior.

Several years ago, I was part of a group that included an elderly man who was often rude and mean.  When he was confronted with that behavior he responded by saying that was just the way he was made.  He used "I'm just being Authentic" as an excuse to act poorly and treat people with great unkindness.  That's not real Authenticity because to be truly Authentic means we know we are all a dynamic work in progress.

To be Authentic means we don't use Authenticity as an excuse for bad behavior and an unwillingness to grow and change.

In what ways are you doing your best to be Authentic? Can you be gracefully honest about your strengths, gifts, and challenges?  Are you making room for others to be their Authentic selves too? Are there certain situations or relationships that temp you to use Authenticity as an excuse for poor behavior and a lack of growth? How could you approach those circumstances with a healthy sense of being Authentic?

Here's to being Authentic with ourselves and others this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

The Next Step

I recently attended a conference where one of the speakers referenced the phrase, "A long obedience in the same direction." This quote is first attributed to the philosopher Friedrich Nietzsche, but was also picked up by an author in the Christian tradition, Eugene Peterson, who wrote a book he titled with that exact phrase. Of course, many of us may know this idea better from the more modern philosopher, Dore' in Finding Nemo, who said, "Just keep swimming!"

No matter which philosopher you choose, the principle this is trying to teach and the point the speaker at my conference was trying to make is the same - perseverance makes a big impact on our lives.  Our ability to continue to keep taking small, incremental steps in the same direction is what will eventually help us accomplish what might seem like unattainable and even very distant goals. It can become even more challenging when we think about it in terms of the total distance or the larger objective, because it's hard to see how we are going to get there. But, if we can remember that the whole journey is made up of many small, Next Steps, it will help us to just keep swimming!

New fact about my life - my dad was a part of the team that invented the round baler system - you know all those round bales that you see in the fields?  I don't think I really appreciated the significance of that work and his accomplishment when I was a teenager. It's just what my dad did - worked on balers. Boring! But as an adult I have a different perspective on the amount of work, invention, and problem solving that went into that project. In reflection, I can see that he didn't wake up one day with the whole idea and design completely worked out in his head.  He had the seed of an idea and then just started working toward it, one step at a time, solving one problem at a time, tackling the next part of the design they needed that eventually allowed them to complete the entire project. It took years, and it happened by taking each Next Step as it came.

What are you facing in your personal life or in your leadership life that feels like a monumental task? How could you apply this approach of just taking the very Next Step to that situation? Perhaps you're so focused on the whole thing that it's preventing you from even being able to see the Next Step? How could you adjust your focus, so you shifted your attention to looking for just the Next Step, not the whole thing?  When you can see the Next Step, what will it take to lean in and just take it?

Here's to taking the Next Step this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

Sharing Courage

I've written about the interplay between Fear & Courage before, but I recently came across some new ideas related to courage and encouragement and thought those might be a good follow up to last week's thoughts on Help!

I've actually heard two new ideas related to courage that are related, so let me describe each one and then see if we can connect the dots with a fun story.

En-Courage: To Give Courage

I was chatting with some leaders last week and as we were talking one of them said they found it so helpful when they understood that to en-courage someone was to actually give them some courage.  Now, that may seem like a "No duh, Stephen!" to you, but it felt like it really opened up an insight for me. Maybe I've always viewed encouragement as a simple way to help someone else feel supported or like I had their back, but this made me think that what I am actually doing is working to actually increase their courage within themselves. That is an insight that helps me think about en-couragement more as a powerful part of em-powerment, where I am actually trying to support someone in using their own power, which might require me passing them some of my courage for them to use.  

Borrowing Courage

Sometimes I think we need to be able to borrow courage from another individual or group of people in order to help us keep moving. We may not have enough courage in our own hearts, so we need to reach out and borrow some from others we trust. Maybe they can see things from a different perspective, or they've actually accomplished this task in front of us that is requiring some extra courage, but whatever the case may be, there are times when we need to borrow a cup of courage from our neighbor to help us keep moving forward.

I think you can see how these two ideas match up pretty well, but let's see if the story helps bring it all together.

I recently witnessed a situation in which an adult was trying to encourage a young person to take a risk and be a bit more adventurous on a trail.  The younger one had been pretty brave up to a certain point but had allowed fear to cause them to stop and not go any further (they froze). The adult started with some simple verbal en-couragement, giving reassuring messages to try and empower the younger person to keep moving on their own power.  However, at one point the adult also came over and took the hand of the young person, which was this powerful act of actually being able to borrow courage from the adult.  Through both the en-couragement of the adult, and the ability to borrow courage by the young person, they were able to finish out the trail together!

As you reflect on your life right now, where do you think you can be an en-courager? Is there a particular person who comes to mind that you are wanting to continue to support and empower? How might you give them some extra courage to keep climbing? Maybe you are in a situation that has just about got you locked up and frozen in place? Is there someone nearby or a trusted colleague or friend who's maybe been down this road before that you might be able to "grab their hand" and borrow some of their courage to keep moving? 

Here's to Sharing Courage on the trail this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.