Cynical is Easy!

I've recently fallen into a trap that I do my best to avoid - being cynical!  

To be Cynical means believing that people are motivated purely by self-interest, or to be distrustful of human sincerity or integrity.  Perhaps you can see why I've fallen into this trap recently, because it's just so easy!  It feels like just about everywhere I look there are people that seem to be motivated by their own self-interest, and I can quickly become distrustful of their sincerity and their integrity.  The truth is, being Cynical is Easy!

The problem is, it's not actually helpful or productive. When I fall into the easy trap of cynicism, it makes me more closed off and judgmental, and I take a much more jaded view of everyone around me. It's like it resets my default from being generous and compassionate to being cautious and wary.  When I'm in the trap of being cynical, it's like the best version of myself is stuck and being prevented from showing up in the world.  

Thankfully, I have had a couple of conversations in the past week that have brought my attention to this, not because people noticed and were pointing it out, but because we were actually talking about one of the antidotes to being cynical - Working to assume good intent.  It was through these chats about the better version of myself that I realized I had fallen into the trap.  In fact, it made me go back and revisit some of my own thoughts on working to assume good intent that I've written about before (so I won't rehash them here), which reminded me of the main point I want to highlight today:

Yes, being cynical is easy and being generous is hard, but it is totally worth the effort!

When we do the hard work of assuming good intent and taking a generous approach toward others, we are able to approach people with more compassion and a greater openness to their perspective and ideas.  It helps to soften our hearts and look for the good, which can lead to greater gratitude and positivity.  And practiced over time, the better version of ourselves are released in the world, allowing our relationships to develop in healthier and stronger ways.

How about you? Have you fallen into the trap of cynicism with me lately? Does it tend to happen with a particular situation or individual? How could you do the work of assuming good intent in that situation or with that person? What would it take to open yourself up and take a more generous approach? How could you switch from starting with judgement and start with curiosity instead?

Here's to avoiding the easy trap of being cynical this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center. We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we'd love to support you! Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.