Carry On!

Last week we took a look at the final C of the 8 Cs of Self-Leadership from the IFS-Institute. Originally, I intended that to be the final entry in this series, but I've been thinking all week of another C - Carry On. 

Not the luggage, but the action.

I shared each week that I hoped this series would help to create some positive focus as we continued to move our way into 2025.  That one idea alone speaks to how much I believe that life is truly a journey, and that each day brings another opportunity to keep learning and growing. So, I thought I would take one more week and leave you with a very simple recap of the 8 Cs and then ask some simple questions about how to Carry On in this journey.

Calm - actively cultivating a greater sense of peace and serenity that counteracts being so reactive to circumstances

Curiosity - embracing exploration and discovery as primary approaches to life

Confidence - living with the perspective that no matter what may come, it can be faced with purpose

Compassion - being open-heartedly present and appreciative of others and myself

Creativity - looking at life from new perspectives and without predetermined outcomes in mind

Courage -  remembering it isn't necessary to turn off fear, but to simply turn up the courage dial

Clarity - focusing on life and circumstances with honesty and objectivity

Connectedness - paying attention to particular and universal connections that cultivate feeling supported 

If you were to Carry On with just one of these over the course of the next month or so, which one do you think would be the most impactful for you? How could you continue to lean into growing and cultivating that C in your journey of life? If you were going to create some type of tool or reminder for yourself to help you Carry On in that focus, what would it be - a new mantra? A post it note on your computer or mirror at home? A new screen saver on your computer or phone? Finally, who could you share this with as a way to help you Carry On in this journey of growth and learning? How could they support you as you keep moving forward into 2025?

Let's Carry On - this week and beyond!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

Connectedness

Here we are - our final look at the 8 Cs of Self-Leadership from the IFS-Institute and their founder, Dr. Richard Schwartz (Calm, Curiosity, Confidence, Compassion, Creativity, Courage, Clarity, and Connectedness). Hopefully, this series has created some positive focus as we keep moving forward into 2025.

We've already touched on Calm, Curiosity, Confidence, Compassion, Creativity, Courage, and Clarity, and this week we turn our attention to the final C - Connectedness.

Connectedness

In their approach to Connectedness, the IFS-Institue focuses on connections that are both small and large, or as another one of my friends would say, in the particular and the universal.  

When we think about small Connections, that means we are seeking to connect with particular individuals or a team or group. Meaningful connection happens with people we can see face to face and learn their name and their story. We get to know them, and they get to know us - we become connected.  Obviously, there can be different strengths of Connection in this particular way, because we may feel a stronger sense of connection with certain individuals or groups than we do with others.

This is where another aspect of the IFS-Institute's perspective is also helpful, namely that the purpose of Connection is to help us relax and find a greater sense of comfort and peace in being our authentic selves.  It's absolutely critical that we seek and find the kind of particular Connections that allow us to (in their words) "relax your defenses with others as you know that you won't be judged or controlled." 

But there is also a critical element in discovering a sense of Connectedness in the more universal and expansive way, like with a religion, some type of spirituality, or even just a general sense of being connected to something greater than ourselves.  This larger sense of Connectedness is critical because it helps us to step back and hold our present circumstances with greater transcendence or a feeling that we know "this" isn't everything.

When we find Connection to the more universal, we are able to hold our present circumstances with more of a loose grip and not let it consume or overwhelm us.

Finally, it's important to remember that the point isn't to achieve some level of Connectedness, but to celebrate the Connections we have and learn how to grow into a greater sense of Connectedness, both in the particular and the universal. This is a journey of movement and ongoing growth and discovery in our Connections.

As you think about these two aspects of Connectedness, what particular Connections can you celebrate and cultivate today? Who do you have in your life that helps you feel more grounded and comfortable being yourself, and how could you grow those kinds of particular Connections in your life? And what about the universal? Is there a larger framework that you are drawn to and feel a sense of Connection with? How cold you explore that expansive Connection in a way that helped you step back from your circumstances and see them from a healthier perspective?

Here's to cultivating our Connectedness this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

Clarity!

We're down to our final two weeks of looking at the 8 Cs of Self-Leadership from the IFS-Institute and their founder, Dr. Richard Schwartz (Calm, Curiosity, Confidence, Compassion, Creativity, Courage, Clarity, and Connectedness). Hopefully, this series is creating some positive focus as we keep moving forward into 2025.

We've already touched on Calm, Curiosity, Confidence, Compassion, Creativity, and Courage, and this week we turn our attention to Clarity.

Clarity

With several of these elements, I have made reference to portions of the definitions from the IFS-Institute.  This week, I want to share their full definition for Clarity because it has so much wisdom by itself.

Clarity

1. the ability to perceive situations accurately without distortion from extreme beliefs and emotions

2. the ability to maintain objectivity about a situation in which one has a vested interest

3. the ability to recognize one’s own bias or preconception and then seek a deeper understanding

Powerful, right?!

A few thoughts from my perspective:

First, I love that each layer is about an ability, because that means it is something we can work on and grow, which also fits so well with their whole idea of moving toward each of these elements of the 8 Cs. It's not about accomplishing some level of achievement, but continuing to grow and focus on our ability to have greater Clarity.

Second, part of the invitation here is to "stand at a distance" from ourselves - to take a step back and look at things with a clearer perception.  So much of the time when we are in the middle of something, we can get so caught up in it we can't really notice what is actually happening. But if we can take a step back and see things a little more objectively, we will often gain some real Clarity about the situation, which can help us see new approaches and choices we may not have seen before.

Finally, there is also an element of truth telling here. One of my favorite questions to ask myself and that I often encourage clients to ask of themselves is, "What do I actually know is true here?"  We can get ourselves tripped up when we pay more attention to the story we are telling ourselves about a situation or a relationship than we do the actual facts of what we really know about it.  We jump to conclusions or allow our bias and prejudice to cloud the actual basic facts, so being honest is a way to increase our Clarity and helps us navigate those tough situations better.

What about you? What ideas do their definitions of Clarity raise for you? Is there a situation or relationship you are too close to right now, and taking a step back would help to increase your Clarity around it? Perhaps there is something you are jumping to a lot of conclusions about? What impact would it have if you just slowed down and asked, "What do I actually know about this situation? What are the raw facts?" Is there a friend or a colleague you could chat with who could help you see a particular circumstance or relationship from a different perspective, and how might that help with your Clarity?

Here's to gaining more Clarity this week!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.