Eventually!

I just had a friend return from a trip that included a 10-day trek through a section of NorthUmbria in the UK. They did some research on their adventure before they went, but interestingly enough, most of the guidebooks talked about the history of the area, the various landmarks and scenery along the way, but didn't include too much information about the topography of the land.  So, much to my friend's surprise, their trek involved a lot more elevation change from day to day than they realized! However, through some significant perseverance and effort, they made it!

At one point along the way, their GPS went out and they just had to follow the descriptions in the guidebook that included phrases like, "walk between the two fences," and "go alongside the burn."  One of the phrases even read, "eventually you will come to a road," without a reference to any specific distance. Turned out that "eventually" took almost 2 hours of walking!

I've been reflecting on that word "Eventually" since my friend told me that story, and I have been wondering how many times I might have been tempted to quit something if I actually knew the actual distance connected to it.  For example, I've been working on some projects in my backyard.  Eventually, several of them have gotten done, but most of them have taken me longer to complete than I originally thought (and involved way more trips to Home Depot than I planned)!  Now that they are complete, I am very happy with them, but if I had known at the beginning how much time, energy and money it was going to take to get them finished, I may have been deterred from starting.  Knowing that I would "eventually" get done helped me get started and allowed me to just keep going in the process. 

Maybe there are some areas of your life where you are in the middle of the trek and the only marker you have right now is "eventually." Eventually the project will be finished.  Eventually the position will be filled.  Eventually your choices will help bring about the results you want. Is there a way you can use the "Eventually" as a motivation to press on?  Can the vision of what you know is coming in the future help you just keep taking another step forward today? Could it even be possible to relax into the "eventually" enough that you can enjoy your current place on the journey right now?

Here's to knowing this week that "eventually" we'll get there, so we'll just keep walking today!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

Kind? True? Necessary?

Sometimes I wish I could forget lessons I have learned!  

When I was in college a friend of mine shared with me three small questions he asked himself before he spoke: "Is it kind? Is it true? Is it necessary?" He told me that if he couldn't answer yes to all three, then he would not say what he was thinking!

Of course I had questions about his questions!

"What if it's kind and true, but not necessary?" 

      "Why would I say it if it wasn't necessary? That would probably only create trouble or drama that no one wants."

"What if it's kind and necessary, but not true?"

      "Why would I want to tell a lie? How does that help anyone?"

"OK, but what if it's true and necessary, but it isn't kind?"

      "Then I figure out a way to say it differently so it is kind, and if I can't, why would I want to be unkind?"

All good points, and you can see why there are times I wish I could forget this life lesson!

The truth is, these three, small questions have actually served me well over the years. I know there have been times when I failed the test and opened my mouth anyway, and usually the results were less than helpful!  I have also discovered over the years that I can apply this to actions as well. Is what I am about to do kind, true and necessary? And if not, then why would I want to do that?  When I am able to listen to these prompts and I take a moment to analyze my motives, I am often being driven by fear or anger or spite, and it's never a positive outcome when I'm speaking or acting from those motivations.

How could you use these three questions in your own life this week?  Are there certain relationships where they could be very helpful for filtering your words or actions? Are there specific leadership situations where they might be particularly impactful? 

Here's to using these three questions well this week: Is it Kind? Is it True? Is it Necessary?

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

Liminal Space

I've shared before that a theme frequently emerges from a few, unrelated conversations I have with people in the course of a week, and when that happens it inspires me to share it here.  Accordingly, allow me to express a few thoughts on Liminal Space.

Liminal Space is the space in-between or waiting time. Here's a great description: "Liminal space is the uncertain transition between where you've been and where you're going physically, emotionally, or metaphorically. To be in a liminal space means to be on the precipice of something new but not quite there yet. The word 'liminal' comes from the Latin word 'limen,' which means threshold."*

Perhaps you are in Liminal Space now, but regardless of your present reality, at some point we all either have or will experience it. To be honest, it can be a tough to navigate. The times I have been in Liminal Space have made me feel uncertain and even anxious. At the very least it can often feel unsettling to be in this in-between. Even though it can feel a bit daunting, I have found a couple of practices that help in navigating Liminal Spaces positively.

Gratitude

To be in-between implies that something has ended or is coming to an end, and the new thing has not yet begun. During this time of waiting, I have found great comfort in reflecting on what's ending and expressing gratitude for it.  For example, if it's a relationship you can spend time thinking about the ways in which that relationship brought positive impact to your life, and even consider expressing that to the person if possible.  Maybe it's a season, like the ending of a job or moving to a new location. What was it about that season or place that helped you grow or develop, and how could you express gratitude for that?

Rest

I'll be the first to admit I am not great at this. I tend to always think about what else needs to be done and what I could be doing next. But rest is a critical element for us to be able to function well and at our best, and one of the gifts of Liminal Space is it can lend itself to natural rest. The very essence of being in-between means there isn't as much to do right now (and don't worry, that new threshold is coming so there will be lots to do later!), so we can take advantage of the natural break in activity and recoup and rejuvenate.  If that's the case, what are the ways you could take advantage of the natural time to rest? How do you normally find renewal and rejuvenation and what would it mean to prioritize those kinds of rhythms in your life?

Whether you're in Liminal Space right now, or that time is coming, here's to navigating it with some positive intention!

Be Well,

Stephen

Center was created to support individuals and teams so they can live from their Purposeful Center.  We specialize in professional coaching and leadership development and we’d love to support you!  Click on our Services page to book a free consultation.

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